Thursday, January 14, 2010

My life should be a sitcom...

I am sure we have all had those days. You know the kind where you wonder how your life ended up the way it did? Well, that was my Tuesday evening. We had just gotten back from the boys swim lessons....which were a disaster in themselves. Brayden does not enjoy the classes. He hangs onto you for dear life and if you try to get him to do his floats he SCREAMS bloody murder. Then you have Evan who is now in level 1 and in the "big pool." He is more interested in playing then the actual lesson part of the class. He is starting to let go of the wall and then goes completely under water and freaks out, hence freaking us all out.

Anyway, (Act 1) I get home and put dinner on the table (which no one eats) and then clean up with two kids plastered to my legs (Brayden screaming that I am his mommy and only his mommy while Evan is informing him I am his (Evan's) mommy too and then a fighting match begins). Meanwhile a white dog has laid down in the middle of the kitchen rug and I turn around and nearly fall on my ass tripping over her.

(Act 2) I feed the dogs and then let them out to go potty. I let them in. I decide to try and use the restroom myself. As I am sitting down two boys and a white dog rush the bathroom door and barge in so I am not paying attention really to what I am doing and I sit down.......on a wet toilet seat!!!!!!! (The joys of living with 3 boys!)

(Act 3) So as I am sitting their in pee trying to go pee the dog sits on my feet so I reach down to pet her and BAM my hand goes through a big glob of SHIT on her collar. WTF? Yes, Belle like to eat poop and we have tried everything to break her of this habit, but she still does it on occassion. How she managed to get a glob on her collar and nowhere else has stumped me, but she did. So now not only is my butt wet and gross, but my hand is shitty and I still have two boys fighting over my attention. My only saving grace to this was that I am 100% stuffed up and cannot smell a damn thing. (Of course, if I could smell I probably would have smelt the shit before I put my hand in it). The most ironic part of this whole story is that Brayden tried to warn me about the poop on Belle's collar before this happened. After I had let the dogs in Brayen sad "Mom, poop" and pointed to Belle. I took it as she smelled like poop (which she occassionally does after she eats a poopsicle) and nothing else. My mistake!!!!!!

(Act 4) Mommy gave up!


Kim Cervone said...

that was WAAAYYY better than any sitcom I have seen lately!! Whew, thanks for the laugh (I have had similar evenings, BTW) Oh, if you feed the dog whose poop is being eaten pineapple, the offending dog will probably stear is working with Daisy.

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